Anxiety Sobriety: Freedom from Being Overwhelmed

Full of adrenaline, I paced the room with a nervous energy that wouldn’t go away. I tried sitting down, but then instead of pacing I began wringing my hands and rubbing my arms and legs. My body seemed confused… searching for a movement, any type of movement, that would release the energy I was carrying. My mind was spinning, and I’m sure at some point my lips actually moved, mumbling in an attempt to process the flood of thoughts swirling through my brain. It started with one thing I was worried about, then snowballed forward into a torrent of unpleasant thoughts that consumed me with fear and worry. The restlessness extended into the night and I could hardly sleep. For some reason I just couldn’t relax. This might sound quite familiar to anyone who has battled anxiety.

Coulda Woulda Shoulda

Much of my life has been spent playing it safe.  However, right before I met my wife, I made a decision to step outside my comfort zone and live my life free of regrets.  Things that I normally would not have done in a million years, I did.  Had it not been for that change, my wife and I would not be together today. In order to get myself in a state where I actually had the desire to step outside my norm, I imagined what it would be like to reach the end of my days and reflect back on my life if I kept playing it safe.  This exercise gave me the perspective and motivation to make a change. Regrets are typically the result of living life based on fears and the expectations of others as opposed to the results we truly want.  Fortunately, even though we cannot change the past, we have the chance to change the present and future based on what we have learned.  However, we must remember that eventually our time here will be up, so we shouldn't take tomorrow for granted. I wrote the poem Coulda Woulda Shoulda to express what it would be like to live a life of fear and eventually run out of time.

Anxiety Sobriety: Freedom from Being Overwhelmed

Full of adrenaline, I paced the room with a nervous energy that wouldn’t go away. I tried sitting down, but then instead of pacing I began wringing my hands and rubbing my arms and legs. My body seemed confused… searching for a movement, any type of movement, that would release the energy I was carrying. My mind was spinning, and I’m sure at some point my lips actually moved, mumbling in an attempt to process the flood of thoughts swirling through my brain. It started with one thing I was worried about, then snowballed forward into a torrent of unpleasant thoughts that consumed me with fear and worry. The restlessness extended into the night and I could hardly sleep. For some reason I just couldn’t relax. This might sound quite familiar to anyone who has battled anxiety.