I’m done. Done being pushed around by life. Done feeling like a spectator to my own story. Done trying to meet everyone else’s expectations. Done living based on what other people think. Done giving the best of myself to people who don’t appreciate me. Done sacrificing for those who always put themselves first. Done allowing others to dictate my schedule. Done making ZERO time for ME.
I am slowly finding my way back to good. Back to outdoor adventures and exploration… Creating games with my imagination… Simple causes for celebration… I’m finding my way back to good. Back to family dinners with conversation… Dinner for two with no expectations… No laptops or work while on vacation… I’m finding my … Continue reading Back to Good
We’ve all had them. Their aim is true, and their timing is perfect. To say you haven’t had one is to say you haven’t dreamed. They can go by many names…
What is “enough”? There is no “enough”. I simply am. I am only meant to be me, So I am always whole. I am not people’s judgments of me. I am not people’s expectations of me.
Much of my life has been spent playing it safe. However, right before I met my wife, I made a decision to step outside my comfort zone and live my life free of regrets. Things that I normally would not have done in a million years, I did. Had it not been for that change, my wife and I would not be together today. In order to get myself in a state where I actually had the desire to step outside my norm, I imagined what it would be like to reach the end of my days and reflect back on my life if I kept playing it safe. This exercise gave me the perspective and motivation to make a change. Regrets are typically the result of living life based on fears and the expectations of others as opposed to the results we truly want. Fortunately, even though we cannot change the past, we have the chance to change the present and future based on what we have learned. However, we must remember that eventually our time here will be up, so we shouldn't take tomorrow for granted. I wrote the poem Coulda Woulda Shoulda to express what it would be like to live a life of fear and eventually run out of time.
Regret Sometimes in my reflection I think, "Where did my promise go?" I'm miles and miles from measuring up To visions from long ago.
Do you have a lot of people depending on you? Do you feel pulled in so many different directions that you might explode? Are your own needs typically an afterthought, and do you often find yourself addressing your needs later than you should, or not at all? I realize the world isn’t going to save itself, and that everyone in your life needs you desperately (and RIGHT NOW), but hear me out on this one because I speak from experience...
Do you ever feel guilty for taking time off? I could be the only one, but I doubt it . Vacation guilt is only one of many symptoms of being a workaholic. Other signs you need to chill out include: Not taking time off in the first place Thinking something will go wrong with the business/team if you are not working Constantly checking work emails on your days off
Full of adrenaline, I paced the room with a nervous energy that wouldn’t go away. I tried sitting down, but then instead of pacing I began wringing my hands and rubbing my arms and legs. My body seemed confused… searching for a movement, any type of movement, that would release the energy I was carrying. My mind was spinning, and I’m sure at some point my lips actually moved, mumbling in an attempt to process the flood of thoughts swirling through my brain. It started with one thing I was worried about, then snowballed forward into a torrent of unpleasant thoughts that consumed me with fear and worry. The restlessness extended into the night and I could hardly sleep. For some reason I just couldn’t relax. This might sound quite familiar to anyone who has battled anxiety.